Aufschauen statt wegtindern

Er hat ein Smartphone; (c) Manfred Kirschner, 2017

 

Smartphones lassen uns auch in unserer intimsten Sphäre nicht in Ruhe: Vielmehr bieten sie uns unzählige Dating-Apps, in denen wir über Gesichter wischen um zu entscheiden, mit wem wir den nächsten Kaffee trinken oder die nächste Nacht verbringen. Das Single-Dasein wird damit erträglicher, denn Mut braucht es nicht mehr, jemanden anzusprechen – das Smartphone kann es richten. Unsere Angst, enttäuscht zu werden? Wie weggeblasen. Man hat einander ja schon im Vorhinein zugesichert, dass man sich – zumindest optisch – gut findet. Worauf es dann hinausläuft, entscheidet sich im realen Leben, insofern der digitale Flirt nicht schon beim Austausch unzähliger Nachrichten aufgrund von ein- oder beidseitigem Desinteresse zum Erliegen gekommen ist.

Doch was passiert mit dem Zufall, der eben manchmal darüber entscheidet, dass zwei (oder mehr) Menschen sich ineinander verlieben, sich feiern, gut finden und am Ende vielleicht heiraten, durchbrennen, oder auswandern? Schalten wir dieses magische Etwas dank optimierter Algorithmen, die uns mit unserem perfekten Gegenüber matchen, einfach aus? Akzeptieren wir, dass der Mensch, der uns im Park entgegenläuft eigentlich extrem heiß ist, gut zu uns passt – wir ihn nur leider nicht wahrnehmen, weil wir auf unser Smartphone gucken, um das Angebot in unserer Nähe per Wisch zu erkunden? Die französischen Chiche-Brüder haben kürzlich eine virtual Doku gedreht, die sich genau damit beschäftigt und das Szenario auf die Spitze treibt: Einer der Hauptdarsteller hat einen Algorithmus entwickelt, der 100 prozentig den:die perfekte:n Partner:in garantiert. Ich habe mir ein paar Folgen angesehen. Und ich glaube, dass wir uns wirklich fragen müssen, ob wir das wollen, ein kühl kalkuliertes Liebesleben, in dem es keine Überraschungen mehr gibt – keine bösen, aber auch keine schönen.

Die Methode von Versuch und Irrtum – trial and error – hat sich nicht umsonst in vielen Zusammenhängen bewährt. Sie bedeutet, anhand von Erfahrungen und Erlebnissen herauszufinden, wer man selbst ist, wer man sein möchte, und wie man die Distanz dazwischen maßgeblich verringert. Versuch und Irrtum sind fundamentaler Bestandteil vieler Entscheidungen, die wir treffen – sie helfen uns, Kurs zu korrigieren, neu zu navigieren und uns gewahr zu werden, wo es hingehen soll. Wir sollten auch in Sachen Liebe davon Gebrauch machen, anstatt unsere romantischen Hoffnungen in die digitale Welt auszulagern, um so perfekte Ergebnisse zu erzielen. Denn wer sich nicht verläuft, lernt die Gegend nicht kennen und bleibt in seiner eigenen Einseitigkeit stecken, anstatt die Vielfalt und Vielheit anderer Menschen wahrzunehmen. Der Zufall kann uns auf unserer Reise nur maßgebliche Hilfe sein und wir sollten wieder aktiv daran arbeiten, dass er überhaupt die Möglichkeit hat, in unser Leben einzuschreiten. Zum Beispiel indem wir mal wieder auf- und uns umschauen, anstatt andere via Wisch wegzutindern. Andernfalls nehmen wir in Kauf, die wirklich magischen Momente in der realen Welt schlichtweg zu verpassen.

 

von CAG

127 Antworten auf „Aufschauen statt wegtindern“

  1. Im Jahr 2017 saßen 6 Menschen ( 5 Männer und eine Frau) in einem Abteil der Deutschen Bahn. Dieses Abteil war ein Ruheraum. Ein Schild der Deutschen Bahn hat auch darauf aufmerksam gemacht. Handy nicht gestattet. Und Psssst.
    Die Herren der Erschöpfung zückten unverzüglich als sie ihre Plätze eingenommen hatten, Laptop und mehre Handy aus.
    Die Frau schaute sich alles in Ruhe an. Es war ja ein Ruheraum. Den sie sich auch für ihre Fahrt nach Nürnberg gewünscht hat.
    Die 5 Herren nutzten fleißig ihre Smartphone und ihre Laptope und sahen alle sehr erschöpft aber wichtig aus. Es war ein gebimmelle und gequatsche. Die Frau hatte irgendwann die Nase voll und sprach: Meine Herren! Sie sehen doch sicherlich die Schilder hier in diesem Ruheraum? Ja sehen wir! war die Antwort der 5 Herren. Wunderbar, sagte die Frau. Dann macht es Ihnen doch sicherlich nichts aus, ihr Laptop einzupacken ihr Handy auszuschalten und die Fahrt in Ruhe zu genießen.
    Erst waren die Herren sehr irritiert und wollten protestieren. Doch die Frau ließ nicht locker. Sie wollte ihre Ruhe von denm Gebimmelle und Gequatsche haben. Das Ende der Geschichte war: Die Herren waren sehr einsichtig legten Ihre Foltergeräte weg und die 6 Menschen unterhielten sich über dies und das. Es war eine wunderbare Fahrt. Zum Schluss bedauerten die 6 Menschen auseinander gehen zu müssen. Man hatte sich doch noch soviel zu sagen.

  2. Hallo,
    als ich von RASF und den Jungs und ihrem Vorhaben in einer Tageszeitung gelesen habe, wurde ich neugierig und recherchierte im Netz und wurde fündig. Die Schlagwörter irritierten mich erst. Ficken finde ich nicht so prickelnd, ich halte es diesbezüglich etwas konservativ. Doch lieben statt liken hat mich sehr angeregt.
    Nun zum Kernthema: Nach meiner Berliner Zeit ( ich habe so gerne in Berlin gewohnt) lebe ich jetzt ländlich. Umgeben von Vogelgezwitscher, üppiger Natur und fast täglichem Rasenmähen. Das Münsterland ist sehr aufgeräumt. Hier ist alles sehr ordentlich. Vieles zugepflastert und zuzementiert.

    Das Münsterland ist Fahrradland. Das wissen viele. Vor allen Dingen die Stadt Münster.

    Ist ja auch ein tolles Fortbewegungsmittel.
    Mein letztes Erlebnis mit einem Fahrrad war reinster Horror.

    Als Fußgänger wurde ich von einem Fahrradfahrer überholt der freihändig fuhr und dabei lauthals schrie. Nicht das ich ihm aus dem Weg gehen sollte, nein, er schrie in sein Smartphone. Da er seinen Überholvorgang nicht mit einer Fahrradklingel ankündigte und ich durch sein Schreien auf ihn aufmerksam wurde, sprang ich zur Seite.

    Mutig schrie ich ihm hinterher, das ist verboten auf dem Fahrrad zu telefonieren.

    Er hatte ja noch eine Hand frei und mit dieser zeigte er mir seinen Stinkefinger.

    Ich war platt. Hinterher rennen war nicht so mein Dingen. Ich bin auch nicht mehr so flink wie ein Wiesel.
    Aber ich war doch sehr wütend.
    Der Fahrradfahrer wurde dann doch aprupt gestoppt.

    Ein Fußgänger der vor ihm auch lauthals in sein Smartphone schrie, versperrete dem Fahrradfahrer seinen weiteren Fahrweg.

    Um es kurz zu machen: Zwei Smartphonejunkies haben sich auf der Kreuzung getroffen. Der Fahrradfahrer hatte einen Beinbruch, der Fußgänger einen Armbruch. Das hielt die Beiden aber nicht davon ab, weiter zu telefonieren. Die Whatsapp machte ihre Runde. Beide hatten ein beindruckendes Erlebnis,das mussten doch alle Bekannte,Freunde und Fremde wissen.

    Wer ist jetzt hier schlimmer? Der Fahrradfahrer oder der Fußgänger. Beide waren Straßenverkehrsteilnehmer.

    Das Smartphone der neue Killer? Das Dingen tut doch nichts. Nur ihre Besitzer.

    Ein Experte berichtet:
    Die Smartphonenutzung ist mittlerweile auf den Straßen in Österreich verantwortlich für ein Drittel aller untersuchten tödlichen Unfälle.

    Fachleute sind sich mittlerweile einig: Das Smartphone ist neben dem Alkohol, dem Rasen sowie das Fahren ohne Gurt als vierter großer Killer im Straßenverkehr zu sehen.

    Und was ist mit den Fußgängern? Ein Blinddate!

  3. 2 Blinde

    Neulich habe ich beobachtet, wie ein blinder Mann mit Stock den Eingang in eine Behörde nicht finden konnte (seltsame Automatiktür). Nebendran stand ein Mann mit Hemd und Krawatte. Wäre dieser nicht in sein Phone vertieft gewesen, hätte er mit einem kurzen Handgriff dem Blinden ganz einfach helfen können.

    Da er aber selbst blind war für seine Umwelt, hat er die Not nicht mal mitbekommen.

    Ich stand auf der gegenüberliegenden Straßenseite, konnte wegen Rot an der Ampel nicht sofort selbst helfen, war aber sehr traurig über die Szene.

    Ähnliches erlebe ich manchmal an Bahnhöfen, wo z.B. Mütter sehr analog ihre Kinderwägen die Treppe hoch schleppen, kaum einer bietet von sich aus Hilfe an, weil kaum einer das überhaupt mitkriegt, den Kopf immer schön nach unten ins virtuelle Privatuniversum. Was gehen mich die Leute auf der Bahnhofstreppe an, die gehören doch gar nicht zu meiner Whatsapp-Gruppe.

  4. Woww! Bin beeindruckt vom RASF- Team! Ist es nicht so das wir das kleine Glück übersehen, ignorieren (oftmals absichtlich), weil wir auf das große vergeblich warten? Was nützt mir die hübscheste Frau, wenn ich mit Ihr nicht reden kann? Tinder und Co habe ich noch nie gebraucht. Persönlich ist mir allemal lieber. Emoticons sind mir zuwider, ebenso wie Apps und der übertriebene Gebrauch der „Nervtöter“. Die Welt, die Menschen, Beziehungen (auch meine eigene) sind zum Wegwerfartikel verkommen. Der Grund? Ein Smartphone! Ein Cafe zu besuchen, gerät in Wien schon zum Hindernislauf. Sie sind überall! Frauen und Männer haben ihr Smartphone länger, als ihre PartnerInnen. Dabei suchen wir uns ja diese selbst aus und viele fragen sich, warum sie scheitern in der Beziehung. Meine Wenigkeit achtet auf Körpersprache, wenn ich die Chance habe ein entzückendes weibliches Wesen zu treffen, doch oftmals wird es jäh verdorben, durch den „Nervtöter“. Ein Date/Treffen mit einer Frau, die wirklich Fragen an mich hätte, echtes Interesse zeigt, hatte ich seit 4 Jahren nicht mehr. Denn es scheitert immer am. . . . PS: Habe Eure Seite durch Zufall entdeckt und bin froh, all die Kommentare zu Euren Artikeln zu lesen. Weiter so! Ich dachte, alleine mit dieser Meinung zu sein, doch es gibt mehr von „Uns“! Liebe Grüße Michael

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